{"id":12553,"date":"2019-01-04T07:00:06","date_gmt":"2019-01-04T12:00:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/?p=12553"},"modified":"2019-01-01T21:34:43","modified_gmt":"2019-01-02T02:34:43","slug":"review-everything-is-horrible-now-edward-lorn","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/review-everything-is-horrible-now-edward-lorn\/","title":{"rendered":"Review: Everything is Horrible Now by Edward Lorn"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"12554\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/review-everything-is-horrible-now-edward-lorn\/horriblenow\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/horriblenow.jpg?fit=297%2C475&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"297,475\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;1&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"horriblenow\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/horriblenow.jpg?fit=297%2C475&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-12554\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/horriblenow-219x350.jpg?resize=219%2C350\" alt=\"\" width=\"219\" height=\"350\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/horriblenow.jpg?resize=219%2C350&amp;ssl=1 219w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/horriblenow.jpg?w=297&amp;ssl=1 297w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 219px) 85vw, 219px\" \/><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Everything-Horrible-Now-Edward-Lorn-ebook\/dp\/B07MKR11ZH\/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&amp;qid=1546395361&amp;sr=8-1&amp;keywords=everything+is+horrible+now+lorn\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><em>Everything is Horrible Now\u00a0<\/em>by Edward Lorn<\/a><br \/>\n<\/strong><strong>Lornographic Material (February 5, 2019)<\/strong><br \/>\n<strong>372 pages; $4.99 e-book<\/strong><br \/>\n<strong>Reviewed by\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/ChadLutzke\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Chad Lutzke<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Right up front, allow me to get past the part of the review where I\u2019m forced to write something clich\u00e9&#8212;a statement proclaimed in reviews since the beginning of time. Well, since the beginning of Goodreads and Amazon at least: \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This is my first by this author, and it won\u2019t be my last. <\/span><!--more--><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">While the above statement is true, it\u2019s painful to write. I\u2019m supposed to be a creative, offering clever ways of stating the simple, beautifying a sentence and adding flavor to an otherwise bland declaration. But it was going to be in here somewhere so why not right at the beginning? Get it over with. A quick summation of my past and future history with the writer.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Everything is Horrible Now<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is the fourth book in <a href=\"https:\/\/edwardlorn.wordpress.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Edward Lorn<\/a>\u2019s Bay\u2019s End universe&#8212;his very own <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Castle Rock,<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> if you will. This being the fourth book is a little detail I didn\u2019t find out until a quarter way through. Because I\u2019m a completist, it was upsetting. I don\u2019t care if it\u2019s a series of books, a movie franchise, or rewatching every episode of <em>Seinfeld<\/em> for the 6th time, I want to start at the beginning. And if I can\u2019t do that then I won\u2019t even start. Fortunately for me, <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Horrible<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> felt like a standalone. Toward the end I did sense I might be missing out on a heightened reading experience, maybe an Easter egg here and there, had I been more familiar with Bay\u2019s End, but I was never completely lost. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Right away the book kicks off with a sense of dread as a pastor kills his wife, baby, then himself, while a young boy watches. The baby. Yes, Lorn goes there. And while the murder is not graphically depicted, the entire horrific scene is orchestrated such that the reader becomes leery of future pages. What other unsettling disturbances lie ahead? <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This tone is kept throughout much of the book, and by the time you\u2019re halfway through, it feels like shower time. Not quite fetal-position shower, but a quick one to regain composure, get the dirty written word off your skin, the Irish Spring in the air and a splash of favorite cologne\/perfume to distract you from the atrocities happening in Bay\u2019s End. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As the mystery of Father George\u2019s spontaneous act of barbarity unfolds, Lorn breaks away intermittently, giving characters backgrounds that never feel like info dumps or padding. These strategically placed sections are interesting, entertaining and build both hatred and empathy for the helpless pawns in Bay\u2019s End. This is all textbook stuff for writers: A beginning hook, organic characterization and background. But not every author subscribes to that, particularly those within the self-published and small press realms, both of which where Lorn resides. But he\u2019s been to the school of Stephen King\u2019s <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">On Writing<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> (and other creative-writing bibles) and hit the honor roll, taking extensive notes on pace and killing darlings.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">However, this review is not without complaints. One of them merely being based on personal preference, while the other is a bit of mold on an otherwise healthy loaf of bread.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The story heads into other-dimensional, cosmic horror-type areas that normally aren\u2019t in my wheelhouse. But it\u2019s Lorn\u2019s impressive writing and characterization that kept me interested enough to enjoy the rest of the book. I realize I\u2019m the lonely guy at the party standing with maybe one or two others, eating the plain chips and double-dipping, raising our noses at stories that ask too much in regard to suspension of disbelief, while most of our peers are on the dance floor without a care in the world as they proudly dance in the skin of otherworldly beings. So, take that complaint with a grain of salt (man, I was really trying to stay away from clich\u00e9s here).<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">My biggest complaint, and I suspect I may not be so alone with this one, are the handful of \u201cpreachy\u201d moments in the book that completely pulled me out of the story and felt more like agenda rather than fiction, as Lorn explores atheism versus creationism. Part of this was necessary for the story, but much of it wasn\u2019t. As someone who reads fiction for escapism, political and religious arguments will pull me out of a story faster than anything. Thankfully these moments are few, and again, it\u2019s Lorn\u2019s stellar writing that kept my palm away from my face while my eager fingers turned the pages.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For those on the dance floor, this one\u2019s for you. For you, nothing is horrible here. This is your jam. And because it\u2019s such a catchy one, I suspect the plain-chip guys in the corner&#8212;the ones who don\u2019t want to dance&#8212;will find themselves cutting the rug anyway with any of Lorn\u2019s Bay\u2019s End books if they\u2019re as good as <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Everything is Horrible Now<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Everything is Horrible Now\u00a0by Edward Lorn Lornographic Material (February 5, 2019) 372 pages; $4.99 e-book Reviewed by\u00a0Chad Lutzke Right up front, allow me to get past the part of the review where I\u2019m forced to write something clich\u00e9&#8212;a statement proclaimed in reviews since the beginning of time. Well, since the beginning of Goodreads and Amazon &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/review-everything-is-horrible-now-edward-lorn\/\" class=\"more-link button bg-gold white\">Continue Reading!<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;Review: Everything is Horrible Now by Edward Lorn&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[80],"tags":[1156,1662,1661,79],"class_list":["post-12553","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reviews","tag-chad-lutzke","tag-edward-lorn","tag-everything-is-horrible-now","tag-reviews"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.5 - 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