{"id":16628,"date":"2022-01-19T07:00:47","date_gmt":"2022-01-19T12:00:47","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/?p=16628"},"modified":"2022-01-15T17:27:23","modified_gmt":"2022-01-15T22:27:23","slug":"review-sister-funtime","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/review-sister-funtime\/","title":{"rendered":"Review: Sister Funtime by Spencer Hamilton"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"16629\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/review-sister-funtime\/sisterfuntime\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/01\/sisterfuntime.jpg?fit=313%2C500&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"313,500\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;0&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"sisterfuntime\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/01\/sisterfuntime.jpg?fit=313%2C500&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-16629\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/01\/sisterfuntime.jpg?resize=219%2C350&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"cover of Sister Funtime by Spencer Hamilton\" width=\"219\" height=\"350\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/01\/sisterfuntime.jpg?resize=219%2C350&amp;ssl=1 219w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/01\/sisterfuntime.jpg?w=313&amp;ssl=1 313w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 219px) 85vw, 219px\" \/><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Sister-Funtime-Spencer-Hamilton\/dp\/1952075076\/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1S1XIF8BL55OJ&amp;keywords=sister+funtime&amp;qid=1642278282&amp;s=books&amp;sprefix=sister+funtim%2Cstripbooks%2C170&amp;sr=1-1\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><em>Sister Funtime\u00a0<\/em>by Spencer Hamilton<\/a>\u00a0<\/strong><br \/>\n<strong>Nerdy Wordsmith (November 2021)<\/strong><br \/>\n<strong>140 pages; $9.99 paperback; $2.99 e-book\u00a0<\/strong><br \/>\n<strong>Reviewed by\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/HaleyNewlin22\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Haley Newlin<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>There&#8217;s an old saying that water can wear away stone, but only over hundreds of years. In a classic Stephen King novel,\u00a0<em>Christine,\u00a0<\/em>a character<em>,\u00a0<\/em>argues that people are not stone, but mortal.<\/p>\n<p>Spencer Hamilton&#8217;s\u00a0<em>Sister Funtime<\/em> untethers this phrase from such limitations and instead strangles it into a festering devout, sinister power &#8212; something inhuman and hungry for flesh. <!--more--><\/p>\n<p>Sister Mary Matthew arrives on St. Tereasa&#8217;s Joyous Youths Orphanage steps beaming with the thought of becoming the children&#8217;s favorite nun.<\/p>\n<p>Within moments of arrival, she meets the unpleasant head of the orphanage, Sister Agatha Eustace, who beats the doldrums of the old place with ruthless, bloody, and tyrannical tactics &#8212; all, of course, in the name of God. The children secretly call her &#8220;Sister Killjoy.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Sister Mary finds sanctuary in a fellow nun, Ines, and the children, particularly twin sisters named Hanna and Haley (whom the author actually named after my twin sister and me. A little nod that meant the world).<\/p>\n<p>Despite the harsh ruling of Sister Killjoy, Sister Mary still finds ways to have fun with the children, playing games, and cooking breakfast. Soon, they give her a nickname too &#8212; &#8220;Sister Funtime.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>But not all is glee and sunshine, as Sister Killjoy would say, &#8220;Too much sunshine leads to sin.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Sister Mary feels God has abandoned her and her prayers are unanswered. Malevolence transpires at the orphanage &#8212; sick children denied medical treatment, a crowded cemetery, cruel punishments, and a demented man who takes the children away, one at a time, for &#8220;fun.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>And then, Sister Mary feels a force within her &#8212; within the cross she wears around her neck. A guiding force that burns into her flesh and quickly becomes the almighty guidance she&#8217;d been praying for.<\/p>\n<p>Hamilton&#8217;s religious horror novella is a steadfast, pulverizing read. Readers, you&#8217;ll be at the edge of your seat, wincing at every thorn, nail, and flame\u00a0<em>Sister Funtime<\/em>\u00a0conjures in this tale of penance and fury.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;ll be grabbing a copy of\u00a0<i>Smileyland<\/i>\u00a0soon!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Sister Funtime\u00a0by Spencer Hamilton\u00a0 Nerdy Wordsmith (November 2021) 140 pages; $9.99 paperback; $2.99 e-book\u00a0 Reviewed by\u00a0Haley Newlin There&#8217;s an old saying that water can wear away stone, but only over hundreds of years. In a classic Stephen King novel,\u00a0Christine,\u00a0a character,\u00a0argues that people are not stone, but mortal. Spencer Hamilton&#8217;s\u00a0Sister Funtime untethers this phrase from such &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.cemeterydance.com\/extras\/review-sister-funtime\/\" class=\"more-link button bg-gold white\">Continue Reading!<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;Review: Sister Funtime by Spencer Hamilton&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[80],"tags":[2299,79,2545,2546],"class_list":["post-16628","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reviews","tag-haley-newlin","tag-reviews","tag-sister-funtime","tag-spencer-hamilton"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.3 - 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